Sunday, November 25, 2007

I am thankful.

In the grand tradition of blended families (ours, at least anyway) the older four are with bio-dad for Thanksgiving. Every year, they depart the day before Turkey day and come home the day before school starts. Just in time to dump copious amounts of dirty laundry and bring home whatever the virus du jour is in Virginia.

This year I started out thinking that I will really enjoy life whittled down to just two kids. TWO! How easy, simple, and lovely!

And it does start out that way. I rise, feed Evan, tend to Elle, actually get to hear myself think while I enjoy my bowl of Special K. I get chores done without hearing endless rounds of "He touched me", "I can't find my shoes", and "Mom, is liquid soap flammable?".

I have time to do things I enjoy too. I finished my book, researched cloth diapers, and even had the time to call and tell Curt that Evan's newest, cutest phrase is "Why not?". (One hand on hip, the other waving airily...it's delicious). Curt and I can watch a rated R movie, nary a underage child in sight.

But the thing is, I miss them.

I miss my Emma. I miss the that despite the fact that her birthday is in May, her brain is constantly reorganizing the guest list for this fete now in November. (Clearly, we cannot invite Nathan, as he is a boy, and we'd need to purchase an extra life vest if he wanted to swim, since we only have four.) She really worries about this. And where her pink socks are. You know, the ones with the tiny pom poms?

I miss Lucas, who talks so fast and whose speech is so garbled that he rather ends up sounding like Mickey from Snatch. His sweet little goofy innocence. And, how no matter how hard his brothers try to ditch him, he loves them endlessly and follows them like a forlorn puppy. He's just so affectionate and happy, ask him to help you make dinner and you have made his day. He just wants to be with you.

I miss my Brett, whose little ADD world is constantly changing and interesting. The other day he wanted to know why they didn't teach knitting in school. Knitting is cool, he said. If you get bored, you can knit. Plus, it keeps you warm. I love that he listens to the beat of that very different drummer in his head. Plus, it keeps me warm inside.

And Mike. Who is now cutting it very close to six feet tall. Mike, who turned 14 the day their dad picked them up for the holiday. He's so trying lately. So full of mood swings, sweet and helpful one minute, surly and sarcastic the next. Worried about the girl on the bus who teases him, but not at all about his science grade. But, how I love him. And despite the fact that we're starting to have some hard times in our relationship right now, I am blessed to be his Mommy.

Two is wonderful sometimes. For a day, maybe. But then I realize that despite the horrific amount of chaos that having six children causes, I wouldn't have it any other way.

So, I'm ready to have them back. The washing machine is empty, ready, and waiting. And I'm poised by the door, with a bucket for the puke in one hand, and the other arm ready to hug them all.

1 comment:

LarryLilly said...

My kids are grown, my first wife, their mother, passed away many years ago, and I am remarried. Its a different holiday, mainly without them, and well, I miss having them over during them.

But this year, we are going to converge on Orlando for a week of extended family holiday the week before Christmas, and we will all be glad to depart when that week is over I am sure LOL.